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Sunday, April 05, 2020 
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What Grabow's Rambling About Now

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About This Site

EGrabow HD is my home on the internet: serving as soap box, digital distribution center, and creative outlet. This is a place to express myself. If I like a design, have an opinion, or just want to play around... this website is where I can place it, post it, try it, whatever.

"HD" stands for "High Definition," but not in the HDTV/ consumer electronics sense. I've had this website since 2001, and in the time I've been here I've gone from teen to adult, New Yorker to Floridian, become a more spiritual person, and even discovered a desire for writing fiction. I've learned more about the man I am... as if becoming higher-definition myself. With reflecting this journey it was appropriate to give it the "HD" title. Besides, I like the branding.

New stuff is always popping up here... don't hesitate to let me know if there's anything I could do to make it better.

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A Sample From My Novel

On my second attempt, I tried to disassociate myself from my vanitar as much as possible. I willed myself to see with my eyes closed and the vision returned, and with it a sense of the staggering energy around me. I was amazed to see the amount of computer activity that went into a running construct: the countless calculations per second that had to be exactly right.

Raskob said something about a thread connecting me to my body. I tried to find it. I tried - hard - to recapture what I'd had in the dragon's lair. I searched the construct as well as I could for a sword or other object that stood out, but found none. I thought about when I was in DR paralysis, nothing more than a tiny energy. I saw an energy bending and refracting across a kind of maze, focused like a spotlight on my consciousness. There was another pattern, too, focused on a different sector of the construct. I followed the other pattern and saw an outline from three decks below: Auon's vanitar talking to one of the game characters. I could see the words but not hear or understand them. As I tried to adjust my synchronization, my head - my real head - began throbbing and my vision blurred. I quickly retreated to my own room. The pain faded.

I was impressed with my unexplored abilities, though the senses sapped my strength. I knew the software which made up my interface - not to mention my own natural senses - weren't designed to do what I was pushing them to. I thought again of the power the sword gave me, a power that made it natural to see through the construct, one that only got bad when I tried to block the senses out. I looked for ripples in the room. Instead, I found some kind of gleaming, like the light reflecting off of glass powder, emanating from every solid object. The points of light moved too fast for me to track them, though, and I couldn't tell where anything led. It reminded me of the static of an antique television.

I saw the door about fifty centimeters behind me and tried to examine the energy passing through it. I saw my vanitar's right hand and the three-dimensional space around it. Careful not to send any nerve impulses to my vanitar, I tried to manipulate the space around my arm and hand. They nudged closer to the door. I observed the construct's energy flowing through the door and through my hand. I tried to make one object pass through the other. The energy increased, and the temperature of the air rose sharply.

Mind-blowing pain seized me and I was back in my vanitar. A blackened, smoking hand ejected from the melted door surface. I fell to the floor.

"Command vanitar: reset!"

Caffeine, Chapter 9

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